1 post tagged “work”
As I opened the mail this morning I discovered a letter from my employer regarding my five year anniversary with the company.
Excerpts from the enclosed letter:
"... we offer you a special collection of high quality service awards from which to choose, as illustrated in the enclosed brochure."
and my favorite:
"I sincerely hope that you will accept your award with pride each time you use your gift or display it for others."
Lets ignore that horrible sentence from our company's President and CEO for a moment. I want to discuss these "high quality service awards". Such as:
Coby Portable CD Player - $18.71
Hamilton Beach Slow Cooker - $19.99
Calphalon Griddle - $15.99
Other items I couldn't find exact replicas of online were the 128MB Coby Portable MP3 player. 128MB HOLY SHIT!
A radio cooler bag! I think a vendor gave me one of these last year. A plastic battery-operated anniversary clock. Let's celebrate our marriage with a $20 clock baby!
My favorite:
CUISINART DOUBLE SANDWICH MAKER. ROCK ON!
Boy, Do I feel valued. I can't wait to display my sandwich maker for others. One look and they'll instantly envy me for working here. Or, they'll head over to Target and for $19.99 they can feel just as valuable as me.
